Modern Creator
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Joe Hudson | Art of Accomplishment · YouTube

Replace the Story You Tell Yourself 100 Times a Day

A 16-minute teaching on the one gratitude practice that actually competes with your not-enough loop.

Posted
2 months ago
Duration
Format
Talking Head
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107.8K
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Big Idea

The argument in one line.

The not-enough narrative is self-talk you repeat hundreds of times a day, and a felt, relational, daily gratitude practice is the only specific intervention that competes with and replaces it.

Who This Is For

Read if. Skip if.

READ IF YOU ARE…
  • You carry a low-grade belief that you lack something - money, love, respect, time - and it shapes what you notice and how you respond.
  • You have tried journaling gratitude or saying it at dinner and found it changed nothing lasting.
  • You want a concrete, repeatable practice you can start this week, not a mindset shift to intellectually accept.
SKIP IF…
  • You are looking for clinical or therapeutic approaches to scarcity thinking - this is a peer-practice technique, not professional guidance.
  • You already have a daily felt-gratitude practice with a partner that is working.
TL;DR

The full version, fast.

The not-enough belief is a self-talk loop: believing you lack something filters what you notice, generating more evidence for the belief. Journaled or mental gratitude stays intellectual and does not break the loop. The fix is a 7-10 minute daily exercise with another person - relational, felt in the body, spoken aloud in single sentences, traded back and forth. The witnessing and the emotional depth are the active mechanisms. Done once or twice daily, the practice directly competes with the not-enough loop and gradually replaces it as your self-definition.

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Chapters

Where the time goes.

00:00 – 00:57

01 · The problem: not enoughness as self-talk

Not enoughness is not a fact - it is a perspective. Identifies money, love, attention, friends, and respect as common axes. Sets up the promise: move from lacking to enough.

00:57 – 03:10

02 · Why the internal story shapes reality

Told you are an idiot 100 times a day, you believe it. Same mechanism for lack: the not-enough story filters what you see and who you think you are. Child-behavior example illustrates the loop.

03:10 – 05:28

03 · Why gratitude works - and what makes it effective

Gratitude replaces the lack story. Three requirements for effectiveness: felt/somatic sense, being witnessed by another person, and sufficient consistent duration.

05:28 – 07:03

04 · The expanded solution set

Gratitude shifts problem-solving from what is wrong/how do I fix it to what is right/how do I grow it - doubling the available options.

07:03 – 13:27

05 · Exactly how to do the practice

Sit across from someone (Zoom is fine). Uncrossed open body. Drop into the body first. Share one gratitude sentence focused on the area of lack. Switch. Repeat 7-10 minutes. No side conversations.

13:27 – 16:17

06 · Three ways to sabotage the practice

(1) I do not have time - start with gratitude on time itself. (2) Making it a chore - if it does not feel good, you have not done the practice yet. (3) Doing it to get somewhere - still implies lack.

Atomic Insights

Lines worth screenshotting.

  • The not-enough feeling is self-talk, not reality - told to yourself hundreds of times a day, it shapes what you actually see in the world.
  • Intellectual gratitude (journaling, dinner grace) is far weaker than felt, witnessed, spoken gratitude - the mechanism is emotional, not cognitive.
  • Mirror neurons mean gratitude compounds relationally: your partner's felt gratitude deepens your own in real time.
  • Bigger emotional experiences rewire behavior faster - the practice works partly because deep felt emotion accelerates the rewrite.
  • Being witnessed by another person adds a second change mechanism beyond internal belief: social identity shift.
  • Seven to ten minutes is the threshold where the feeling actually lands - shorter sessions stay in the head.
  • Doing the practice in order to get something still implies you do not have it, which feeds the scarcity and breaks the mechanism.
  • Telling yourself to stop a thought rarely works - you need a replacement thought, not a suppression. Gratitude is the replacement.
  • Gratitude done right should feel better than a dopamine hit from scrolling. If it does not, the practice has not clicked yet.
  • Solving from what is right and how to grow it doubles the solution set compared to what is wrong and how to fix it.
Takeaway

The only gratitude practice that rewires the scarcity story

WHAT TO LEARN

Felt, witnessed, daily gratitude is the only thing that competes directly with the not-enough loop your brain runs hundreds of times a day.

01The problem: not enoughness as self-talk
  • Not enoughness is not a fact about the world - it is a perspective you hold, expressed as constant internal self-talk that shapes what you perceive.
02Why the internal story shapes reality
  • The not-enough belief is self-reinforcing: it filters what you notice, generating more evidence for itself - the loop only breaks when you replace the self-talk, not suppress it.
03Why gratitude works - and what makes it effective
  • Journaling or mental gratitude stays intellectual and therefore weak; the practice requires a somatic felt sense in the body, not just a thought in the head.
  • Being witnessed by another person adds a second change mechanism: social identity shift on top of internal belief change, which is why spoken paired practice outperforms solo practice.
04The expanded solution set
  • Mirror neurons make the practice compound: trading single-sentence gratitudes back and forth deepens each person's emotional experience in real time.
05Exactly how to do the practice
  • Seven to ten minutes is the threshold - shorter sessions stay cognitive and do not produce the felt confirmation that rewires the self-definition.
06Three ways to sabotage the practice
  • Doing the practice in order to get somewhere still implies you do not have the thing, which feeds the scarcity and defeats the mechanism. The goal is to see what is actually already present.
  • If the practice does not feel genuinely enjoyable - better than doom-scrolling - it has not clicked yet. That is the quality check, not a nice-to-have.
Glossary

Terms worth knowing.

Somatic sense
A felt physical experience in the body, as opposed to a thought or idea held in the mind. In this practice, gratitude must be somatic to produce behavioral change.
Not enoughness
A recurring internal perspective that some resource - money, love, time, respect - is perpetually insufficient. Functions as constant unconscious self-talk that shapes perception and behavior.
Mirror neurons
Neural circuits that activate both when you perform an action and when you observe someone else performing it. In the gratitude practice, they allow partners to literally feel each other's emotional states.
Resources

Things they pointed at.

06:46productThe Connection Course
Quotables

Lines you could clip.

01:28
“You're telling yourself hundreds of times a day that you are in poverty around this subject.”
Sharpest compression of the mechanism - reframes internal feeling as repeated self-inflicted poverty declaration→ TikTok hook↗ Tweet quote
14:58
“Unless you have figured out a way to do this practice that feels really good, you are not doing the practice.”
Counterintuitive quality standard - reframes enjoyment as proof of execution, not a nice-to-have→ IG reel cold open↗ Tweet quote
16:09
“If you're trying to get somewhere, you're still at lack.”
Tight paradox that breaks the instrumental mindset trap in one sentence→ newsletter pull-quote↗ Tweet quote
The Script

Word for word.

Read-along

Don't just watch it. Burn it in.

See every word as it's spoken — crank it to 2× and still catch all of it. The same dual-channel trick behind Amazon's Kindle + Audible.

metaphoranalogystory
00:00Today, we're gonna take a deep dive into a practice that takes you from not enough to enough. And so we're gonna talk about what the practice is, what makes the practice work, how to do the practice, and then what are the potholes that people fall into when doing the practice that makes it less effective.
00:15But before we get into any of that stuff, we have to know what the problem is. And the problem of not enoughness can happen on many different levels in life.
00:24It can be I don't have enough money. I don't have enough love. I don't have enough attention.
00:28I don't have enough good friends. I don't have enough respect at work.
00:33It's a perspective that shows you that you are somehow lacking. That's what we're talking about when we're saying not enough.
00:41And then we're gonna take that mindset. And with the simple simple practice, we're gonna move it into a self definition of enough.
00:48Oh, I I have enough money. I have enough love. And in that practice, things start to change.
00:55So the practice itself is gratitude. Now there's lots of ways of doing gratitude. A lot of them super ineffective.
01:02So we're not gonna do the journaling of gratitude. We're not gonna do gratitude over dinner. It's not that kind of gratitude.
01:08It's a whole different thing. And we're gonna get into how to do that in a second. The thing to know about gratitude is what makes it so effective.
01:15So if you're walking around every day and I come up to you and I'm like, you're an idiot. You're an idiot. You're an idiot.
01:22Eventually, that's gonna start affecting the way that you see yourself. But if you tell yourself every day, hundreds of times a day, you're an idiot, you're an idiot, obviously, it's gonna affect the way that you see yourself.
01:34Well, when you're walking around with lack feeling like, oh, I don't have enough of this. You don't have enough money. You don't have enough money.
01:40You don't have enough money. And you're saying it to yourself, then you start to actually believe that reality. And the unfortunate piece there is when you believe that reality is that's how you see your reality.
01:51So if you think to yourself, wow, the world is just full of opportunities. And that's the mental model that you're telling yourself regularly, oh, possibilities, possibilities, possibilities. Well, you start looking around, you can see these possibilities.
02:03But if you're constantly thinking not enough money, not enough money, then you're not going to see those opportunities as easily. You're also going to define yourself like you were as an idiot as the person who doesn't have enough money. And how we define ourselves is often how we live.
02:19An example of this is I had a friend who had a kid and constantly was calling the kid naughty. Just you're naughty. You're being naughty.
02:26Why are you so naughty? And so the kid was literally learning they were naughty.
02:31They were being told by their mom on a regular basis, you're naughty. You're naughty. And one day we were discussing it.
02:37We were like, oh, like, do you think that that might be influencing his behavior? And so she stopped calling him naughty. She didn't even start calling him a good boy or anything like that.
02:46She just stopped it. She just said, oh, yeah. You're right.
02:48I'll just say, oh, hey. Please don't do that instead of you're being naughty. And literally, you could see over a six month period his behavior improve because he wasn't being told he was something.
03:00And it's the same thing. Your behavior around the thing that you think is lacking changes if you stop telling yourself that you're constantly lacking it.
03:10Unfortunately, when we tell ourselves to stop doing something, it rarely freaking works. Right?
03:14Like, stop eating so much. Doesn't seem to work very well.
03:17Stop playing so many video games. Doesn't work very well. So you need to replace it with something.
03:22And gratitude is the way to replace this self talk that is constantly telling you that you are in poverty around this subject. And the only way to make gratitude really work at its full optimum capacity is that it is married with emotions.
03:38So it cannot be a intellectual, I'm grateful for this thing.
03:44It is a felt sense of I am grateful for. It has to be felt in your bones. This is for two reasons.
03:51One thing that we know is that when we have bigger emotional experiences, it helps us retrain ourselves quicker than if we don't have those big emotional experiences. So it's why things like reeducation camp works or boot camp works is because they create these big emotional experiences for people which help them change their behavior.
04:11Right? And so that's one thing. The other thing that's really important about doing it so that it works is to be witnessed in it.
04:17So there's one thing to tell myself I'm different, but it's another thing to show somebody else, oh, this thing that I am is no longer the case or to show, hey, this is who I am now. Like, witness to it is also an incredibly important thing to do.
04:34So expressing gratitude just like in a journal is far less powerful than the way that we prescribe doing it, which is to do it with a deep felt somatic sense of gratitude. And then the other thing that's really important about how to make gratitude work is to do it consistently for several minutes.
04:54Like, seven, ten minutes is the perfect length of time to really get the hit, to really go, boom. Oh, I get it. I see it.
05:02I know that this is true. And to do that on a regular basis. Once a day is great.
05:07Twice a day is even better. And you'll start to notice if you do this practice with a felt sense with somebody else, what you're gonna notice is that thing that you feel like there's not enough of, one, you're gonna start feeling like there's enough of it.
05:20Your mental model is gonna switch because you're gonna actually see reality as it is instead of the way that your brain is bending reality to be seen. But the other thing is you're gonna start seeing those opportunities that are out there.
05:32You're gonna start experiencing, oh, this is actually where I get it. And now I know how to get more of it.
05:38Oftentimes, when we're solving problems, we think, what's wrong?
05:42How do I fix it? And that's one way to solve a problem. It's a great way to solve a problem.
05:45But there's also what's right and how do I grow it? And when you're practicing gratitude, what happens is, oh, I can grow that.
05:52I can get more of the thing that's right. Instead of, oh, this is what's missing. How do I go and get it?
05:59And so it gives you twice the solution set that you had when it was just what's wrong, how do I fix it? So for all those reasons, it's really important to do gratitude in a felt visceral sense in a way that is relational with other people so you can be witnessed and that has enough length of time and enough duration over days, weeks, months so that it really starts to redefine you.
06:25You are literally needing to compete with the not enough voice in your head, with that constant perpetual you need more, you don't have enough.
06:33So this practice, this gratitude practice, is like the most basic of the practices that we have in our courses. Right?
06:41It's like the most simple thing. They're wonderful practice. It's very, very powerful.
06:46But if you start to really get into this relational thing, then know that there is a whole bunch more of these practices that you can get if you start doing our courses. And the best course to start with is the connection course. I would say start there.
06:59If you really want other experiments like this that can change your life. So here's the details of the practice. You're gonna sit across from somebody.
07:07You can do it on Zoom if you want, but it's even better to do it in person, but it's not that much better, so don't make that an excuse. Sit across from somebody, and your job is to be position.
07:17Your legs are uncrossed. You're literally in an open body position. And the reason that that's important is so that you can deeply feel the experience of gratitude.
07:27You might even take a moment. You don't have to make this a big thing, but you just relax for a moment into the experience of being here right now in your body.
07:35Like, take a moment to really just close your eyes and go, this is what my body feels like in this moment. That's it. Just like simple.
07:42T take a couple deep breaths and drop in. And the reason you're doing that is so that you can really feel gratitude so that you're not just in your head.
07:55So whatever you need to do to really feel your body is the first step. Keeping an open body position so that your body isn't contracting and you're not closed off to the emotional experience.
08:07Couple other tricks on this is just make sure your chin is down a little bit. Oftentimes, we'll put our chin up like this to make sure that we don't feel or we'll clench our jaw. So make sure your jaw is loose.
08:17Make sure your chin is down. Really take a moment to deeply allow your body to be relaxed without protecting anything.
08:27Okay. Once you've got that, you're gonna sit across from this person and you're gonna say something you're grateful for. You're not gonna do something really long and arduous.
08:37It's not gonna be like this paragraph. It's gonna be a sentence, maybe a phrase, but definitely not two sentences of what you're grateful for.
08:46And what's particular is you're gonna share things you're grateful for around the thing that you feel like there's not enough of. So if you feel there's not enough money, you're going to express gratitude for all the ways that you do have financial resources, how you do have food, how you do have home, how you do have health, and that somehow or another you're clothed, and that somehow or another you're surviving because you have a blanket or you have heat.
09:10Whatever it is, you're gonna look at anything that you have, and you're gonna be grateful for that. You're gonna feel the gratitude and be grateful for that.
09:19If it's something like love, what you're gonna do is you're gonna look at all the places that you are loved, the way that you love yourself, the way that your mom looks at you, or the way that your dog interacts with you.
09:31You're gonna really look at all the ways that you are loved. How many people are caring for you, even if they don't know it's you that they're caring for. Right?
09:41Somebody put love into this video so that you could watch it. Like, can you feel that love? So actually, lots of people put love into this video.
09:51It wasn't just one. And so so can you really allow yourself to feel that in in the gratitude? The next thing that you're gonna do is make sure that you have the felt sense of gratitude.
10:02So the trick here is you can't push it. You can't make it happen. You just recognize it.
10:08You just go, oh, wow. Wow. These people are really doing something out of love for humanity.
10:14I can feel that and I can be grateful for it. I can be grateful for the fact that I am not homeless on the street or that I have a screen to watch this video on. Can I be deeply grateful for that?
10:27And now the job is for seven minutes going back and forth with the person sharing what you're grateful for in single sentences. So you'll share one gratitude, then they'll share one gratitude, then you'll share one more gratitude, and they'll share one more gratitude.
10:43And the reason that we go back and forth like this is because the gratitudes can build on each other. Because we have mirror neurons, we can start feeling each other's gratitude, and we can go deeper and deeper into that experience.
10:56So not only are we doing a length of time to redefine ourselves on this issue, We're also being seen and witnessed, but we're also going into more and more depth of that feeling of gratitude. I wanna show you how it looks so that you can actually feel it in your system and you can do it with me.
11:12So I'm gonna say something I'm grateful for. I'm gonna give you a moment to say something you're grateful for. It's gonna be like a pause in YouTube.
11:20And then we'll come back to me and then back to you. Just we'll just do it a couple times so that you get a felt sense of what this feels like. Okay?
11:29Alright. So dropping into my body.
11:37I'm keeping my eyes open so I'm in deep connection with you. I'm making eye contact with you. You're making eye contact with me so that we can be witnessed with one another.
11:50And I'm gonna start with and remember, whatever you're grateful for is gonna be on that thing that you feel like there's not enough of in your life.
12:02So I'm gonna say I am grateful that you are taking the time to watch this video and that you've made it to this length of time in the video.
12:12And now it's your turn.
12:23I'm gonna savor that gratitude that you just shared, and now I'm gonna share another gratitude.
12:30I'm grateful for all the people who care so deeply on our team about YouTube and making great videos for you.
12:46So that's how you do it. You express a gratitude with somebody, they express a gratitude back, and you keep on like this very slow, very savoring, really feeling the gratitude and just going back and forth like that.
13:01Sometimes tears might come. Sometimes you might be overwhelmed with pleasure. Lots of things can happen, and all of it's okay.
13:10But the trick is to not say anything else outside of the gratitude. Meaning, don't start a conversation. Don't sidetrack.
13:16Just very short sentences of what you're grateful for back and forth. You do that for seven to ten minutes once or twice a day. Great.
13:26So now it's an easy practice. It's super lovely.
13:30If you just did it, you know it's enjoyable. So I wanna talk about how you can sabotage this practice. First thing you can do, you can sabotage this practice by saying, I don't have enough time.
13:41So if you don't have enough time, that means you have poverty around time.
13:45You have time poverty. So start with doing gratitudes around time all the time that you do have. I know if you think you don't have enough time, I know there's at least seven minutes a day of stuff that you're doing that you're not so proud of.
13:57Maybe you're doom scrolling or maybe you're watching news that's not important to watch or maybe you're having a frivolous conversation that doesn't actually satisfy you or maybe you're doing something for your mom out of guilt. But there's something that you're doing for those seven minutes and you actually have just as much time as I have, just as much time as every human being has.
14:17So do a gratitude practice on time. That would be a great start. So that's one way that you can sabotage this practice.
14:24Second way you can sabotage this practice is to make it a to do. Make it a chore. Now I have to do this.
14:30I have to do this twice a day. I have to do it for ten minutes. Max everything out.
14:36If you are not enjoying this, you have not figured out the practice. So the thing about this practice is it is deeply enjoyable. It should be something that feels so good in your system that you want to do it, that you can't wait to do it, where you're like, oh, wow.
14:50I could do this for twelve minutes today. I'm excited. And unless you are doing the practice that way, you are not actually doing the practice.
14:58Because gratitude feels really, really good in your system. It feels better than a dopamine hit from scrolling. So unless you have figured out a way to do this practice that feels really good and just do the practice until you figured out a way to make it feel really good, then you're not doing the practice.
15:14The last way you can sabotage this practice is to do it so that it works. It's so weird to say this, but it's true.
15:22Meaning, like, if you're like, I will do gratitude so that I can have money, so that I can have love. And then you're looking, oh, did I get the love that I want?
15:31Did I? All of that assumes that you don't have the thing you're looking for, which then agrees with the fact that you are in lack. So what's really critical is not to try to get anywhere, but to try to see reality as it is.
15:47To try to understand that you do have more resources than probably most people on the planet, to see that you do like, just the fact that you have a screen that you can watch this teaching on gives you more resources than almost any human being in history of time up until, like, ten years ago.
16:06It's to see what's actually true. Because if you're trying to get somewhere, you're still at lack. And if you're still at lack, you're still defining yourself that way, and the practice won't work.
The Hook

The bait, then the rug-pull.

There is a story running in your head right now. It says you do not have enough - not enough money, love, time, or respect. It is not a feeling that comes and goes; it is self-talk you repeat hundreds of times a day, and it filters everything you see. This video teaches the one practice that actually competes with it.

Frameworks

Named ideas worth stealing.

07:03model

Felt Gratitude Practice

  1. Open body position
  2. Drop into the body first
  3. Single-sentence gratitudes on the area of lack
  4. Trade back and forth with a partner
  5. 7-10 minutes, once or twice daily

The relational, timed, somatic version of gratitude that actually competes with scarcity self-talk - as opposed to journaling or mental gratitude which stays intellectual.

Steal forAny community, coaching program, or morning routine where partners pair up briefly
05:40model

Two problem-solving frames

  1. What is wrong - how do I fix it?
  2. What is right - how do I grow it?

Gratitude unlocks the second frame, which the lack mindset makes invisible. Running both doubles the solution set.

Steal forCoaching intake conversations, retrospectives, creative blocks
CTA Breakdown

How they asked for the click.

VERBAL ASK
06:46product
“The best course to start with is the connection course. I would say start there if you really want other experiments like this that can change your life.”

Single soft verbal mention mid-video, no graphic or link overlay. Low-pressure, well-earned after demonstrating the practice works.

FROM THE DESCRIPTION
PRIMARY CTAWhere the creator wants you to go next.
OTHER LINKSAlso linked in the description.
Storyboard

Visual structure at a glance.

hook/promise
hookhook/promise00:00
mechanism
valuemechanism00:57
why gratitude
valuewhy gratitude03:10
the practice
valuethe practice07:03
live demo
valuelive demo11:00
sabotages
valuesabotages13:27
CTA
ctaCTA06:36
Frame Gallery

Visual moments.

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Story You Tell Yourself 100 Times a Day09:04Frame at 09:16 from Replace the Story You Tell Yourself 100 Times a Day09:16Frame at 09:29 from Replace the Story You Tell Yourself 100 Times a Day09:29Frame at 09:41 from Replace the Story You Tell Yourself 100 Times a Day09:41Frame at 09:54 from Replace the Story You Tell Yourself 100 Times a Day09:54Frame at 10:06 from Replace the Story You Tell Yourself 100 Times a Day10:06Frame at 10:19 from Replace the Story You Tell Yourself 100 Times a Day10:19Frame at 10:31 from Replace the Story You Tell Yourself 100 Times a Day10:31Frame at 10:45 from Replace the Story You Tell Yourself 100 Times a Day10:45live demo10:56Frame at 11:10 from Replace the Story You Tell Yourself 100 Times a Day11:10Frame at 11:22 from Replace the Story You Tell Yourself 100 Times a Day11:22Frame at 11:34 from Replace the Story You Tell Yourself 100 Times a Day11:34Frame at 11:46 from Replace the Story You Tell Yourself 100 Times a Day11:46Frame at 11:59 from Replace the Story You Tell Yourself 100 Times a Day11:59Frame at 12:11 from Replace the Story You Tell Yourself 100 Times a Day12:11Frame at 12:24 from Replace the Story You Tell Yourself 100 Times a Day12:24Frame at 12:37 from Replace the Story You Tell Yourself 100 Times a Day12:37Frame at 12:49 from Replace the Story You Tell Yourself 100 Times a Day12:49Frame at 13:02 from Replace the Story You Tell Yourself 100 Times a Day13:02Frame at 13:14 from Replace the Story You Tell Yourself 100 Times a Day13:14sabotages13:27Frame at 13:39 from Replace the Story You Tell Yourself 100 Times a Day13:39Frame at 13:52 from Replace the Story You Tell Yourself 100 Times a Day13:52Frame at 14:04 from Replace the Story You Tell Yourself 100 Times a Day14:04Frame at 14:17 from Replace the Story You Tell Yourself 100 Times a Day14:17Frame at 14:29 from Replace the Story You Tell Yourself 100 Times a Day14:29Frame at 14:42 from Replace the Story You Tell Yourself 100 Times a Day14:42Frame at 14:55 from Replace the Story You Tell Yourself 100 Times a Day14:55Frame at 15:07 from Replace the Story You Tell Yourself 100 Times a Day15:07Frame at 15:19 from Replace the Story You Tell Yourself 100 Times a Day15:19Frame at 15:32 from Replace the Story You Tell Yourself 100 Times a Day15:32Frame at 15:44 from Replace the Story You Tell Yourself 100 Times a Day15:44Frame at 15:57 from Replace the Story You Tell Yourself 100 Times a Day15:57Frame at 16:09 from Replace the Story You Tell Yourself 100 Times a Day16:09Frame at 16:18 from Replace the Story You Tell Yourself 100 Times a Day16:18Frame at 16:36 from Replace the Story You Tell Yourself 100 Times a Day16:36
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